Exams are finally over and the holidays are here. But I don't feel any least excited for it because i know this time holidays gonna be different. Nothing to look forward for at all. Prolly getting a job to pass time and also help out in my family matters. Just thought things would get better but it gets worsen each and everyday.
I'm just extremely sick of my life. Really hate to see how my mom is. Haven't been sleeping well lately too, thoughts just keep running through my mind and scenarios of events // things i can't forget just keep appearing. Fears appearing in my dream every now and then. And it usually takes me up to 2-3 hours just to fall asleep, now. Friends telling me i've puffy face and eyes nowadays and I guess they notice me more than I do. To add on, i realised blogging might be an alternative way to let my emotions out or at least some space for me to rant. Just had another 2 of my teeth extracted, the numbness and 'missing-tooth-feeling' is getting me irritated. Shall pop some painkillers and head to bed soon. Hopefully i'm able to sleep in peace tonight.
Have you ever wonder, how one can changed so much after one day you wake up?
Like he/she no longer the someone you knew back then. You just realised he/she no longer understands // cares about you. You just realised you're no longer on he/she's mind as often as it used to.
Because i do. I fucking miss the old you very much. So much that it's hurts so fucking badly. I don't know why but I keep questioning myself why you had become to different. Fuck.
